Is Gender Bad?

There are a wealth of legitimate concerns about the gender stereotypes presented in media.  Many have suggested that the social constructed nature of gender (as opposed to biological sex) sets up gender distinctions to be inherently unequal (Berkowitz 2010).  So what is to be done about it?  A growing trend that is getting a lot of media coverage is parents raising their children as "gender neutral".  By now most people have heard about Beck Laxton and Kieran Cooper, a British couple who decided to raise their child, Sasha, as gender neutral.  The couple was finally forced to reveal the sex of their child this January when he started attending primary school.  The general public seems to reject Laxton and Cooper's approach to protecting their child, but why? Let us explore.

 What is right with it?
Agency
A significant positive aspect of the Laxton-Cooper approach is that little Sasha has a lot more agency than most children have.  He is permitted a great deal more choices when it comes to clothing, toys, and general self expression.  It is hard to think of a way in which this could be a bad thing.  Because Sasha's parents hoped to shield him from gender stereotypes they were hyper conscious of the choices they offered him, being sure to provide diverse options.
Free from Stereotypes
 Previous blogs have discussed how adults often unconsciously sexualize children.  Sasha may have less of this to deal with since his sex has been somewhat dissociated from his gender.  Media images of sexualized females or hyper sexual males might have a lesser effect on him because of his limited gender identification.


What is wrong with it?
Identity
While it is true that gender stereotypes are often harmful or oppressive, being part of a gender group can have positive effects.  The problem here is not so much that Sasha does not have a gender but that the rest of the people in his world do.  For better or worse, children (and humans in general for that matter) separate themselves based on shared aspects of identity.  They then develop friendships and bonds, often over shared struggles that surround the social and physical aspects of being male or female.  Though it is entirely possible for a people to bond over things other than gender my worry would be that Sasha (or other such "gender neurtral" children) would be at a social disadvantage, with no preexisting model of how they might (or might not) fit into society.  This might end up having the reverse effect his parents intended.  Instead of being limited by gender he would be limited by lack of gender. Is that any better?


Does it even matter?
In the end, I praise Laxton and Cooper's motives but question their approach.  Their child will still be exposed to gender stereotypes no matter how much they try to shield him.  Do they really think that Sasha will not be influenced by images such as these?

  Ignoring a problem has never fixed it and ignoring gender, or the societal implicaitons of it, won't make gender stereotyping go away.  Media outlets will continue to produce stereotypical images that even children, like Sasha, will be exposed to.

  I would suggest that education about gender stereotypes starting from a young age would be ultimately more effective.  This is also an approach that if Laxton and Cooper were so inclined they could have promoted in their child's school and in their community... unfortunately the community now views them as the looney parents who don't know their child's gender.
How would you/ do you try to protect your own children from gender stereotyping?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2089474/Beck-Laxton-Kieran-Cooper-reveal-sex-gender-neutral-child-Sasha.html